Guests Assemble

Standing/Seated

The prelude occurs before the ceremony, and it's when everyone who isn't in the processional should take their seats so the ceremony may begin. If there are ushers, then they will escort people to their seats. If there are no ushers, then people will seat themselves. Traditionally, there's a bride's side and a groom's side of the aisle. The bride's side is on the left when you're facing towards the altar, and the groom's side is on the right when you're facing towards the altar.

Escorting of Parents/Family

Entrance of Bridal Party

• Entrance of Groom’s Men, Groom and Minister

• Entrance of Bridesmaids, Flower/Ring Bearers

Who Represents Bride?

Who Represents Groom?

Example A: "Who gives this woman to be wedded to this man?"

Example B: "Who supports this couple in their marriage?"

Example C: "Who supports this woman in her marriage to this man?"

Intro and Welcome

Example A: "Dearly beloved [or "ladies and gentlemen" or "friends and family"], we are gathered here today to join Tony and Dawn in matrimony [or "holy matrimony" or "to celebrate the wedding of Tony and Dawn"]. You have previously shared and contributed to their lives, and by witnessing their wedding ceremony today, Tony and Dawn invite you to share in their future with them."

Opening remarks on Tony and Dawn

Example A: "In marriage, two people turn to each other in search of a greater fulfillment than either can achieve alone. Marriage is a bold step, taken together, into an unknown future. It is risking who we are for the sake of who we can be. Only in giving of ourselves fully, and sharing our lives with another, can the mysterious process of growth take place. Only in loyalty and devotion bestowed upon another can that which is eternal in life emerge and be known. Two among us, who have stood apart, come together now, to declare their love and to be united in marriage. The words we say today have no magic or prophetic powers. The power of the wedding vows is merely a reflection of a reality that already exists in the hearts and minds of these two people. [GROOM] and [BRIDE], nothing I can say, or nothing you can say to each other, will ensure a long and happy, satisfying, and committed marriage. Only your love for one another, and your integrity to make your commitment real, can do that."

Example B: "To borrow from poet Edmund O’Neill, marriage is a promise, made in the hearts of two people who love each other, which takes a lifetime to fulfill. Within the circle of its love, marriage encompasses all of life's most important relationships. A wife and a husband are each other's lover, teacher, listener, critic, and best friend. It is into this state that [GROOM] and [BRIDE] wish to enter."

Example C: "Here are some wonderful words [borrowed from 1 Corinthians] that define the true meaning of love: "Love is patient and kind; Love is not jealous or boastful; Love is not arrogant or rude; Love does not insist on its own way; Love does not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices with the right. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails." Learning to love each other and to live together in harmony is one of the greatest challenges of marriage. Marriage is not to be entered into lightly, and we are to hold it in high honor at all times."

Example D: "Love is the reason we are here. In marriage, we not only say, "I love you today", but also, "I promise to love you for all of our tomorrows." [GROOM] and [BRIDE], in the days ahead of you, there will be stormy times and good times, times of conflict and times of joy. I ask you to remember this advice: Never go to bed angry. Let your love be stronger than your anger. Learn the wisdom of compromise, for it is better to bend than to break. Believe the best of your beloved rather than the worst. Confide in your partner and ask for help when you need it. Remember that true friendship is the basis for any lasting relationship. Give your spouse the same courtesies and kindnesses you bestow on your friends. Say "I love you" every day."

1 Corinthians 13:4-7 (NRSV)

4 Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant 5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; 6 it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. 7 It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.

Charge to Congregation

Highlighting their role in supporting the marriage.

"Will you who are present here today, surround the couple in love, offering them the joys of your friendship, and supporting them in their marriage?" or some variation, and the guests will respond "we will."

-OR-

"Two people in love do not live in isolation. Their love is a source of strength with which they may nourish not only each other but also the world around them. And in turn, we, their community of friends and family, have a responsibility to this couple. By our steadfast care, respect, and love, we can support their marriage and the new family they are creating today. Will everyone please rise? I have an important question for all of you, the appropriate response to which is "we will." Will you who are present here today, surround [BRIDE] and [GROOM] in love, offering them the joys of your friendship, and supporting them in their marriage?"

The declaration of intent (sometimes called the "charge") is the "I do" portion of the ceremony. Unlike many of the other portions of the ceremony, the declaration of intent is not optional; it is mandatory.

Example: "Entering into marriage is a decision that requires careful thought and consideration. [GROOM], do you understand and accept the responsibilities of marriage, and do you promise to always love, honor, and cherish [BRIDE]?" [GROOM]: "I do." "[BRIDE], do you understand and accept the responsibilities of marriage, and do you promise to always love, honor, and cherish [GROOM]?" [BRIDE]: "I do."

Many hold the opinion, that the objection portion is tacky and should be avoided. Ultimately, it’s up to you, the couple.

If you are going to include an objection, then consider the following common phrasing: "If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together - let them speak now or forever hold their peace."

"We've come to the point of your ceremony where you're going to say your vows to one another. But before you do that, I ask you to remember that love will be the foundation of an abiding and deepening relationship. No other ties are more tender, no other vows more sacred than those you now assume. If you are able to keep the vows you take here today, not because of any religious or civic law, but out of a desire to love and be loved by another person fully, without limitation, then your life will have joy and the home you establish will be a place in which you both will find the direction of your growth, your freedom, and your responsibility."

If you are reading their own written vows, then now is the time to ask them to read (traditionally, the groom first, and then the bride).

Otherwise, then you'll ask you to repeat after me.

Example A: "Please repeat after me... I, [NAME], take you, [NAME], to be my lawfully wedded [husband/wife], to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness, and in health, until death do us part [or "for as long as we both shall live"]."

Example B: "Please repeat after me... I, [NAME], take you, [NAME], to be my [husband/wife]. I promise to be true to you in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health. I will love you and honor you all the days of my life."

Example C: "Please repeat after me... I, [NAME], take you, [NAME], to be my [husband/wife], my partner in life and my one true love. I will cherish our union and love you more each day than I did the day before. I will trust you and respect you, laugh with you and cry with you, loving you faithfully through good times and bad, regardless of the obstacles we may face together. I give you my hand, my heart, and my love, from this day forward, for as long as we both shall live."

"In our culture we use rings as symbols of eternity and the unbroken circle of love. Love freely given has no beginning and no end. Today you have chosen to exchange rings, as a sign of your love for each other, and as a seal of the promises you make this day."

“Please look into [Name’s] eyes, and place the ring, a symbol of your love for [him/her], on [his/her] hand and say:

Example A: “With this ring, I thee wed.”

Example B: I give you this ring, as a daily reminder of my love for you.”

Example C: “Just as this ring encircles your finger, so does my love encircle your heart. May this ring forever be a symbol of my growing love for you. With this ring, I thee wed.”

My dedication/blessing to you.

"Tony and Dawn”, as the two of you have joined this marriage, uniting as husband and wife, and as you this day affirm your love for one another, I would ask that you always remember to cherish each other as special and unique individuals, just as God cherishes each and every one of us. I challenge you to always respect the thoughts, ideas and suggestions of one another. Be able and willing to forgive daily, do not hold grudges, and live each day so that you may share it together. As from this day forward, may God comfort you both as you find refuge in God, and may your marriage be strengthened by your love and respect. Amen”

"By the power vested in me by State of Florida and by God, I now pronounce you husband and wife."

“Tony, you may kiss your bride!”

“I present to you, the newly married couple, Tony and Dawn!”

Reverse Order of Entrance following Bride and Groom.